WEEK TWO-The Perfectionist.
Boy, did I struggle with this one! Always wanted everything to be done correctly, from gift wrapping to greeting cards, to note-taking in college to perfect dressers draws and linen closets. I had done it all my life; when I saw how much time I wasted making it perfect. Guess what -- it was never going to be perfect". Life is busy, getting the laundry away in the goal now.
This chapter is a must-read, pay attention to all the detail. Funny, one of the scenarios in books is about a girl named Karen. I think some of her stories are scary because of how similar they are to mine. One big thing that stood out for me is she now "Strides for Excellence" rather than perfection. Mistakes will happen. I have learned to forgive myself. Did I do the best job I could do? Yes, I did. Did the project come out how I picture it – maybe? Maybe some of my ideas of perfectionism were unrealistic? Now the goal for me has changed "getting it done" whatever it is -is more important. I don't try for perfection anymore; I just want it off my to-do list.
As a small business owner, perfect is unrealistic. Being kind to myself is more important. Cleaning and organizing 24 hours- 7 days a week - is an impossible task. And I live alone! For all folks reading this blog, you have spouses, kids, pets, pressure jobs, health issues, whatever we are all busy. Be kind to yourself and do what you can. Learn to RELAX. I never relaxed or put my feet up. I would say in the last three years - I have learned to do that. Take a nap if I need too. Be silly, be grateful, enjoy life, and stop worrying all the time.
What are you grateful for, food in your belly, a job that pays the bills, your health, your family? Perfect does not exist. I hope this helps. Have a great week.
"It's About Time, the 6 Styles of Procrastination and How to Overcome Them.
By Dr. Linda Sapadin with Jack Maguire.
Many of us are home in this pandemic. Everyone seems to be reading. I am reading a great book called "It's About Time." For those of you who struggle with projects, time management, organizing, this is a MUST read. However, if you are like me reading a book is difficult. My mind wanders and such, it set my egg timer for (1) hour to read a "learning" book. Read a little each day. Before your day starts or end of your day.
You can still purchase the book I did find copies still available. One of the best parts of the book is the quiz on page 5 which helps determine what type of procrastinator you are. There is another quiz on pages 25/26. Why is this good? Because you can read the chapter that applies to you. However, I determined I am a little of all:
As a professional organizer, I do admit I was a bit of a perfectionist. Many of these styles of procrastination have been part of my life too.
Over the next couple of weeks, I will share some of the traits of each procrastinator and some ways to overcome these traits. I suggest reading the book. But maybe this way to get you started.
Order the book NOW, to give yourself some help. This book was a great find for my organizing library. Thank you, Dr. Linda Sapadin and Jack Maguire. So glad I found your book!
Stay tuned for next 8 weeks each of the Procrastinators. Thanks for reading.
Many of my clients are still not comfortable with me coming to their homes. I get that. Quite honestly I am not sure if I am comfortable either. I plan on following the MA Safety Standards and Guidelines that were provided at Gov. Baker's press conference on May 18th. I will always wear a clean/fresh mask. I plan to wash my hands often. I will not be bringing my tool bag into homes so I don't contaminate clients homes. I will carry my cellphone, my Epi-Pen, small bottle of hand sanitizer and some tissues. Where appropriate I will practice social distancing by working 6 feet away from you. I can work outside, or in an another area of house.
Ask yourself what needs to be done? Can it wait? Have you misplace something? Are you moving? Can I take the "job home with me, do it at my home and bring it back?" Let's discuss your project. Can I coach you over phone/or via zoom. Maybe you can do it yourself with my help. Most disorganized folks that I work with biggest road block is TIME. They don't have them time to organize. Well if you are home and not working --it may be perfect time to organize.
Maybe you are working from home and are having trouble with all papers, emails, files and chaos. Especially if you are homeschooling your kids at the same time. Can help you set up quick filing system to help you through. With the onslaught of school work and your work.
Maybe your an Respiratory Therapist or Nurse or EMT. Your routine and work schedules are exhausting to say the least. You find yourself so exhausted and just trying to keep up with eating/sleeping and the laundry. And then getting up the next day to do all over again. I may be able to help here too. Let me see if I can help coach with time management skills doing first things first.
If you think I can help during this time. Contact me Karen@organizingworks.net or 781-275-8915.
Holiday stress affects all of us in different ways. For the ladies in the crowd they want the prefect “Norman Rockwell” Christmas, or most romantic, glittery New Year’s Eve. Maybe it’s to make the best Thanksgiving Turkey with all the fixings. Like Sarah Evans says “It does not need to be perfect”. Being together should be the goal. Not being perfect. ONLY Perfect Being is the Guy upstairs or Mary Poppins.
Read all about it in this Holidays article written by me below:
Is being disorganized, inherent? I am not sure. I see parents struggling all the time to keep up and stay organized. Heck even I have days when I struggle. We are all being pulled in a hundred different directions. College students have just left for the first time “alone”. Have you prepared them or have you been a parent that does everything for them: the cooking, the cleaning, the time management, the taxi driver and all the other endless tasks? For many, they will struggle academically. For others, life’s tasks, for example, getting to class on time, managing all the homework and exams, doing laundry and keeping their shared room clean and organized, will be a struggle. My first roommate was a SLOB. Never hung things up, her dishes would pile up and the trash would be overflowing. I never got the memo I was the maid. It was gross and at first, I started cleaning up for her because it was embarrassing. But her mother had done everything for her. Don’t get me wrong, I did not know how to cook (we had no dining hall, we were to cook for ourselves) but I was lucky I had girl in my dorm who help me learn how to use electric oven vs. gas oven. I was the youngest of 5 in an Irish household and my mother did all the cooking so that was something new for me.
For the moms and dads who do it all STOP. It’s so important to teach your children now. The younger the better. Now for folks reading this saying I am an adult and I have no idea how to organize or clean. I am simply amazed how many grown adults that don’t know how to do either. I had a lady tell me she was locked in her room as a child for long periods of time (without the use of bathroom or kitchen) until she cleaned up her room. She told me she was locked in her room for almost a week because she did not know how to do cleaning. How she did not starve to death or have a bladder infection I will never know. For her cleaning/organizing was a punishment. Organizing with her was a challenge. Her idea of clean was to put the stuff in trash bags and throw it out. Very sad and very scary.
I always tell people start slow. Work with your kids and help them to pick up there toys each night and put them away. Make their beds in the morning with them. On weekends change the beds, have them help. Have them begin to help do the laundry as young as they can. I think I was twelve. I was the folder at first, and the “carrier” up the stairs for Mom. Cooking was another story with my mom, who was a single mom. She got things ready in the refrigerator with instructions on what to put what in first, second and third. That way when she got home dinner was already going. My four older sisters and I all took turns cooking while doing homework. In this day and age everyone is out doing soccer or cheer leading, no one seems to be home doing homework. I have no idea how folks get dinner on the table.
If your home is cluttered, take a deep breath, tackle one room at time, and one project at time. Work with your kids and learn together. Like the term paper that you tried to do in one night, cleaning/organizing can’t be done in one session. Break up the tasks into doable steps. If you are working with your kids, set some ground rules. NO ONE CAN JUST TOSS THINGS, it has to be a decision done together. Everyone gets a say. Look for easy things like broken items you keep saying your going to fix, things you don’t wear anymore, toys no longer played with, hobbies that never lasted, books you did not like or have not read. Once these items are eliminated, you are freer to work on harder items. The things you love, use, and want to keep.
Tackle one thing at a time say the “DRESSER”. First pull out everything then look at everything. See what fits, what looks good, what do you love, what is tattered, spotted or missing buttons, what did you never like or was too itchy. Make a pile to donate, fold the things you want to keep, and vacuum the drawers. Put like things together, shirts, pants, underwear, scarves, whatever. Dust off the top, toss all the junk on the top too. Make a COIN JAR. Collect all the loose change. You may be surprised how much cash you have laying around. Vacuum again around it. And it is done. Look at what you have done, together.
Reward yourself with an intangible item. Go to movies, go to the driving range, see that play, go for a hike. NO NEW STUFF. Remember, you are trying to clean things out.
Keep the organizing/cleaning going until each room in the house is better. Rome was not built in a day, organizing your house also takes time. Some weeks you will be able to do a task and other weeks there is too much going on. Cut yourself some slack. You can’t organize 24/7. Believe me I have tried.
Teach your children (and yourself now) how to clean and organize. I promise it will be the best lesson ever taught.
Good luck COLLEGE FRESHMEN!!